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a speech to the delegates

August 29, 2008
Op-Ed Columnist
A Speech to the Delegates
By DAVID BROOKS

DENVER

My fellow Americans, it is an honor to address the Democratic National Convention at this defining moment in history. We stand at a crossroads at a pivot point, near a fork in the road on the edge of a precipice in the midst of the most consequential election since last year’s “American Idol.”

One path before us leads to the past, and the extinction of the human race. The other path leads to the future, when we will all be dead. We must choose wisely.

We must close the book on the bleeding wounds of the old politics of division and sail our ship up a mountain of hope and plant our flag on the sunrise of a thousand tomorrows with an American promise that will never die! For this election isn’t about the past or the present, or even the pluperfect conditional. It’s about the future, and Barack Obama loves the future because that’s where all his accomplishments are.

We meet today to pass the torch to a new generation of Americans, a generation that came of age amidst iced chais and mocha strawberry Frappuccinos®, a generation with a historical memory that doesn’t extend back past Coke Zero.

We meet today to heal the divisions that have torn this country. For we are all one country and one American family, whether we are caring and thoughtful Democrats or hate-filled and war-crazed Republicans. We must bring together left and right, marinara and carbonara, John and Elizabeth Edwards. On United we stand, on US Airways, there’s a 25-minute delay.

Ladies and gentleman, I never expected to be speaking before you today. Like so many of our speakers at this convention, I come from a hard-working, middle-class family. I was leading a miserable little life, but, nevertheless, overcame great odds to live the American Dream. My great-grandfather fought in Patton’s Army, along with Barack Obama’s great-grand uncles’ fourth cousin once removed.

As a child, I was abandoned by my parents and lived with a colony of ants. We didn’t have much in the way of material possession, but we did have each other and the ability to carry far more than our own body weights. When I was young, I was temporarily paralyzed in a horrible anteater accident, but I never gave up my dream: the dream of speaking at a national political convention so my speech could be talked over by Wolf Blitzer and a gang of pundits.

And today we Democrats meet in Denver, a suburb of Boulder, a city whose motto is, “A Taxi? You Must be Dreaming.”

And in Denver, we Democrats showed America that we have cute daughters who will someday provide us with prestigious car-window stickers. We heard Hillary Clinton’s ringing endorsement of “the weak-looking thin guy who’s bound to lose.”

We heard from Joe Biden, whose 643 years in the Senate make him uniquely qualified to talk to the middle class, whose family has been riding the Acela and before that the Metroliner for generations, who has been given a lifetime ban from the quiet car and who is himself a verbal train wreck waiting to happen.

We got to know Barack and Michelle Obama, two tall, thin, rich, beautiful people who don’t perspire, but who nonetheless feel compassion for their squatter and smellier fellow citizens. We know that Barack could have gone to a prestigious law firm, like his big donors in the luxury boxes, but he chose to put his ego aside to become a professional politician, president of the United States and redeemer of the human race. We heard about his time as a community organizer, the three most fulfilling months of his life.

We were thrilled by his speech in front of the Greek columns, which were conscientiously recycled from the concert, “Yanni, Live at the Acropolis.” We were honored by his pledge, that if elected president, he will serve at least four months before running for higher office. We were moved by his campaign slogan, “Vote Obama: He’s better than you’ll ever be.” We were inspired by dozens of Democratic senators who declared their lifelong love of John McCain before denouncing him as a reactionary opportunist who would destroy the country.

No, this country cannot afford to elect John Bushmccain. Under Republican rule, locusts have stripped the land, adults wear crocs in public and M&M’s have lost their flavor. We must instead ride to the uplands of hope!

For as Barack Obama suggested Thursday night, wherever there is a president who needs to tap our natural-gas reserves, I’ll be there. Wherever there is a need for a capital-gains readjustment for targeted small businesses, I’ll be there. Wherever there is a president committed to direct diplomacy with nuclear proliferators, I’ll be there, too! God bless the Democrats, and God Bless America!



Copyright 2008 The New York Times Company

behold.........

Obama of Assisi

Obama has arisen!

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Well he has arisen in Denver of all places. Mile high city and mile high dreams. Last night we heard from the original master bs'er (William Jefferson "I am Impeached" Clinton), now we hear from his protegee. Barack Hussein Obama is truly a remarkable speaker. One of the best. He is a true master in delivering from the political pulpit. But when it comes to one on one debative formats, he tends to sputter and back peddle, as evidenced in the recent Saddleback Church appearances of both the "Big O" and "Juan McAmnesty" who showed a sharp witted performance. It seemed that McCain truly out did Obama at the Saddleback event.
Tonight Obama hit a line drive into the heavens at the stadium. Did the ball go over the wall for a homerun? I think a fan may of intercepted the ball from going out and maybe gave him a ground rule double. The Big O's spending plans will hit a brick wall due to the current budget deficits. The tax proposals he outlines would reduce the tax revenue by $2.95 trillion. (this figure provided by The Tax Policy Center) His windfall profits taxes on the big oil companies, which he proposes, is doomed to fail due to the timetable it would take to enact and the debate as to whether it would even get through Congress. If memory serves me, we actually had such a tax in the 80's, which resulted in the reliance of our use of foreign oil imports to increase. Lord Obama's $150 billion clean energy fund is dependent on uncertain financing. The Tax Policy Center has critiqued his health care plan as it leaves the number of estimated uninsured by 18 million in 2009, down from the current 45 million....but leaves millions still without health care. Better than nothing you say? Still not a universal plan per se. (Again based on data from the Tax Policy Center, a non-partisan group.) The "Big O" promises to end the Iraq war. Wonderful. But rushing the Iraqi forces before they are ready to assume a greater role of responsibility gives the insurgents in Iraq a clear timetable to sit out and wait to go back into Iraq full force.
The education plan sounded great too. (So does extra cheese on my cheeseburger.) There is only just so much money available with the budget he is proposing being onion skin thick. He claims to want to give the U.S. a fresh coat of makeup and repair our image overseas. But the U.S. has already changed many of their prior policies that has seen us chat with Iran and North Korea. Plus there is the Pakistan factor. With the prior President overthrown and forced to resign, the Big O would face certain resistance from the Pakistani authorities and likely cause us to pay a hefty price for violating their sovereignty. The Big O mentions curbing Russian aggression by using "tough, direct diplomacy." This does not offer any great chance of success. And as we have seen, all the promises by Russia...talk is cheap. Did the D&C convention accomplish anything? I think they did and had the party come a tad bit closer, even though both sides (political inlaws) don't love to hug each other in the receiving line. As for Obama's speech...while historic, fell flat in the sense that it promised and preached more than can be delivered, no matter how much you fill the preverbial offering plate. In Obama's case, the offering plate may of sprung a slight leak. Now we hear from that "gray haired dude..." Paris are you ready and on cue? The R&C Convention is next week, sponsored by Cialis and Budweiser.